


She’s Not Gone

by choking_on_gold



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Dead Emily Prentiss, Death, Gen, Grief, I'm Bad At Tagging, Sad, Suicidal Thoughts, bau
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:02:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25027381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/choking_on_gold/pseuds/choking_on_gold
Summary: A crying Reid shows up at JJ’s door grieving the loss of his friend, a few minutes later she gets an interesting call from their friend Derek Morgan. (I’m bad at summarizing too 😬)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 36





	She’s Not Gone

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic ever, so please be kind, I’m still learning. Takes place after Emily’s death in S6! Enjoy 💖

JJ opened her door to find a crying Spencer Reid. He was wearing grey and white polka dotted pajama buttoned up, and straight-cut pants matching it. His face was wet and red, his eyes redder with dark circles and dilated pupils.

“Spence!” She said in surprise. Usually he calls first, before coming over, to make shure he’s not waking her up.

“Hey” he said weakly. “Can I come in?” He asked. A sad, soft, hurting tone in his voice. She backed away to give him room to walk inside, and closed the door behind him. She stared at him for a second before embracing her in his arms, and he started sobbing into her neck. “She’s gone. She’s gone. She’s gone...” he repeated, crying harder each time. They held each other for what felt like an eternity, but was only about 5 minutes. JJ’s phone rings, startling them both.

“Hello?” JJ answered, brining the machine to her right ear.

“Is he there?” On the other end of the line, a very broken familiar voice spoke to her.

“Excuse me?” She asked confused.

“Spencer! JJ, is Spencer with you?!” Morgan. It was Morgan on the other end of the line, and he sounded like he was crying. Maybe even more than Reid. Spencer? Morgan wouldn’t have called him Spencer unless it was personal.

“Yeah-Yes! Is-is everything ok?” She started getting concerned.

“I’m two minutes away, please don’t let him leave!” He told her. He sounded kind of demanding as soon she heard him. But the tone in his voice wasn’t demand, it was desperation. He didn’t tell her. No, he begged her. He begged her not to let Spencer leave her house. He begged her in tears. The phone hung up before she could respond, and she was met with her best friend’s confusing expression.

“What happened? Who was it?” He asked, searching her face for answers, but only finding worry. “Morgan...” She replied after a few seconds of silence.

“Morgan...” He whispered with a broken smile, and a mixture of hope, and sadness in his words. The same way he spoke when talking about Emily. But Emily was gone. And Derek wasn’t. She was confused, and they stood there in silence in front of her door. A few seconds later the knock on the door pulled her out of her thoughts and right back to reality.

She opened the door to meet a crying Derek Morgan at her entrance. From his perspective the door blocked the view of where Reid was standing, so he asked her “Is he still here?” She nodded her head opening the door a little wider and he raced in and hugged Reid as soon as he saw him.

“You had me so worried kid!” He spoke to his neck, and Reid started crying again. Which was weird, maybe JJ was too lost in her thoughts after Morgan hung up to realize Reid had stopped crying. She closed and locked the door, and the boys separated upon hearing the tiny metal click to protect them from any outside danger.

“What’s going on?” She asked them, tears starting to fill her eyes just by seeing, not one, but two of her closest friends so sad, and hurting. The boys moved to the living room while JJ made them some tea to relax, in hopes of getting some explanations, or at least give them some comfort.

—————————————————

JJ was sitting sideways on the couch. Legs bent upwards, and her chin resting on her knees. Her arms hugged around her legs, and delicate tears had ran down her cheeks, only leaving dried streaks now. Morgan was sitting right next to her, one leg up, like hers, but the other was bent and sideways, making an L shape, with a sleeping Reid, resting his head on Morgan’s thigh. Morgan ran his right hand through Reid’s hair and extended his hand for JJ to take.

“He called me...” Morgan began “he told me he loved me, and that I was one of his-“ he held his breath for a second, and cleared his throat “he told me I was one of his best friends, and he was really lucky to have had me in his life...” Morgan shifted his gaze from his tea, placed on JJ’s coffee table, to her eyes. _Have had_ JJ thought to herself, and suddenly realized what this was about. “He was- he was gonna kill himself Jayje. I-“ Morgan paused, taking a deep breath to calm himself down, trying, and failing, to contain his tears. “I don’t know what I’d do without him. We just lo--we just lost Emily, I couldn’t bare loosing him too. I went to his house... but he wasn’t there.” Morgan started talking faster, almost in a panic. “I figured you were the next person he’d go and talk to...” JJ looked at him. Really look at him. Like she never had before.

She and Derek had known each other for over 6 years. They’d become best friends, and they knew so much about each other. They trusted each other with their lives, and she’d never seen this side of him. When she looked at him she didn’t see SSA Derek Morgan, or even her brother in arms, she saw him for the kind, loving, person he is. And she knew Spencer’s death would’ve affect him more than anyone on the team. More than her.

She turned around, leaning her back on his left leg, and I guess she didn’t notice she’d taken his hand when he offered it, because his arm went across her stomach when neither of them let go. She leaned her head backwards, resting it on top of his knee, and he dropped his head to her shoulder. They sat there in silence. She stared up, while he stared down, and they both cried softly. He cried in pain at what could’ve happened, while she was glad it didn’t. They lost track time, and exhaustion must have kicked in, because JJ noticed Morgan falling asleep when his grip on her hand slowly loosened.

She knew Morgan was a heavy sleeper, so she lifted his head from her shoulder and leaned it backwards against the wall behind the couch. She then lifted the arm that was resting across her stomach, to rest it across his own instead. She got off the couch, and stretched, before turning to move the boys to guest bedroom. _The couch is no place to sleep_ , she thought to herself, _specially if you’re already emotionally exhausted_. However, she noticed that, before he’d fallen asleep, Morgan had stop running his hand through Reid’s hair, and grabbed his hand instead, intertwining their fingers, and placing their hands above Spencer’s chest.

 _Heartbeat_ , she simply thought, noticing how Dereks fingertips were pressed above Reid’s heart. She grabbed Reid’s right arm that was resting beneath him, and placed it across her neck. Then, separated the boys’s hands, and placed Reid’s left arm across is torso. She put her right arm around his back, and her left arm under his legs, and lifted him off the couch. No matter how tall Reid was, he was very light, and supper easy to carry. She took him to the guest bedroom, and took off his shoes before sliding the bed sheets on top of him. She reached to open the other side, to make it easier for herself when she came back with Morgan. Before leaving, she placed Reid’s shoes neatly next to door, and returned to the leaving room, making sure the door was wide enough for her to return with Morgan in her arms. Which she did.

Something people always assume about her is her strength, or rather her weakness. She might look very petite, but she is extremely strong. Both mentally and physically. Strong enough to carry a sleeping-200lb-Derek Morgan from one room to the next, all by herself. She did the same to him as she did Spence, gently placing the bed covers on top of him and placing his shoes at the door. Before leaving them, though, she returned to give them both a good night kiss on their foreheads, whispering ‘I love you’. She returned to her bedroom, walking lightly not to wake up her boyfriend, who, just like her best friend, was a heavy sleeper, but she didn’t want to take any chances. She slid in her bed and thought _they’re gonna have questions tomorrow morning_ , but didn’t ponder too much on that, given that she fell asleep fairly quickly, embracing her boyfriend.


End file.
